I Was Able To Get Out

I was able to get out today. As many of you know my tendons and muscles were damaged 12 years ago. So bouncing around in a vehicle is extremely painful, thus rendering me pretty much homebound. Every time, and I do mean every time - I get into a vehicle I have first counted the cost. I ask myself:

1. How high is my pain before I leave? Will going somewhere increase my pain to where it’s unmanageable?

2. How far is it (translation, how long am I required to sit in moving vehicle before I get to the destination?) 

3. How long of recovery time will this trip require? And will I be able to rest for a couple of days to regain back the ground I lost before traveling?

I know this sounds like I’m talking about going for a long journey. It’s not, I’m talking about going the corner coffee shop. Or driving the 2 miles to my daughters house. Going to Costco. I’m talking short trips here.

Most times I decide it’s not a good idea to leave the house. It’s not worth the recovery time and pain I know will be required. Or my pain is just too high to begin with. This summer I logged 21 consecutive days without leaving the house.

I say this not to complain, but to try to educate. I am excepting my disability and making peace with it. Do your own research before taking whatever prescription the Dr. has prescribed. All prescriptions have side effects! I did read the precautions the Pharmacist handed me before taking Cipro. However, I was given the short, 1 page version. I didn’t know about the long 4 pages of full disclosure. If I had researched more I would have found that “muscle cramps” could mean LIFETIME muscle/tendon DAMAGE. Not the couple of days of stiff muscles I thought it meant. LIFETIME people! Quite a difference. I’m talking Lifetime changes kind of pain, with PERMANENT damage and no know cure.

You might get the impression I’m against medication. I am not! They do have their place. The U.S. Center for Disease Control recommends Cipro for the plague and anthrax. If I had the plague or anthrax I would be grateful for Cipro. However, I did not have the plague, I had a UTI! There were other alternatives that should have been tried BEFORE they hauled out the big cannons. The motto “Never use a shotgun when a flyswatter will do”. Seems to apply here.

Please, please, please do your due diligence before taking ANY medication. Then make your decision with ALL the facts.

As always, till we talk again.

Art Therapy coloring books in my Etsy shop:
"Under the Sea" Zentangle http://etsy.me/2uyf2lH  

"Hearts"    http://etsy.me/1Kdwykm

Looking back

Well, it’s that time of year again. A time of year where we reflect on our accomplishments, measure our successes, and pat ourselves on the back. Well, someone with chronic illness has a somewhat different outlook on accomplishments/success.

I have spent the last couple of weeks reflecting on where I have landed at the end of 2018. Am I in a different place than I was at the beginning of 2018? You bet, but it’s definitely not for the better. I have lost significant ground. Below is a list of how the year measured up:

Mentally - more struggles here for sure
Neuropathy - huge step back. Big losses here.
Muscle pain - IMPROVED (it’s the little things that make my day)
Weakness in legs - lost ground here - wheelchair needed more often
Vision - has IMPROVED overall but, lately I’m noticing a little loss again.
Sensory Processing - definitely decreased,
Tendons - earlier in the year they were really bothering me. Every step I took I 

    was afraid the tendon would rupture- this has IMPROVED. Yeah!

Overall - Big step back in neuropathy.  It seems like this year is one step forward and two steps back.

So... overall not so hot of a year. Lots of losses, but hey there was a little improvement. I’m definitely learning patience. Oy, for example, John, and I are learning how to navigate AND communicate when using the beast. (Otherwise known as the wheelchair). Him being aware that my feet are out there in front of the chair and not bashing me into something or someone when he is trying to move or turn the chair. Me learning to be patient with John and how we both approach EVERYTHING differently. When wanting move across the room and the obvious way to go would be to the right. John turns to the left to get there. Pure frustration FOR SURE to me. But I now just zip it and smile and know we will eventually get there. Lol

To wrap up I have definitely learned some things this year. And there where more positives too.

I’ve worked hard to:
“Simplify my life” - to bring frustrations down - we have done this by by repairing 

    things not working correctly, moving things to where I can reach it without climbing, 

    getting rid of things saved for “someday” are just a few. Admitting the “someday” 

    ship sailed over ten years ago. I can no longer physically or perhaps mentally do my

    “someday list”.  Doing all the above has cut down on the chaos, and being 

    overwhelmed, I am finding helps me to cope better. More about this in a future post. 

“Communication” - talking more and understanding better

“Realistic Expectations” - I am disabled and can no longer do or live my life as I 

    used to no longer trying to live up to others expectations

“Surrender” this the way it is, deal with it.

“Accept” where I am at = peace

John and I are closer. More in tune with each other. We are in this together...I am not

    alone! God is teaching us to be ONE . Our relationship is better than ever before. 

    We are Both growing spiritually together. We have more than our share of 

    frustrations but the state of our relationship instead getting bitter, is getting better.

And that my friends is my 2018 in a nutshell. 

As always, till we talk again,
Sharon

Art Therapy coloring books in my Etsy shop:
Zentangle "Under the Sea"  http://etsy.me/2uyf2lH  
"Hearts"    http://etsy.me/1Kdwykm